Yeah!!!

2006-12-15T08:27:00.000-08:00

oh well oh well... been really really really long that i didnt blog. And guess what? i forgot everything of it, my id user , my password, waited like 15 mins for them to send to my email to retrieve it back.. well, nvm, i am back, maybe not for long... haha.

ok, what i should write? really no ideal. hmm... i am working, very busy. busy working, and yet working not busy. guess it's in parable, well... i am working in tuas, as an engineering assistant now. Hmm.. actually it's not bad la, like the job scope and environment though, but the people there abit hmm... dun wan say much, ok is ok, jus that they like to gossipe which i really dun wan to get involve, that's why sort of.. but overall it's ok la, i jus wan to be more quiet over there, do my work and that's all.. Very typical working people, wah.. hate it ! No choice.

Well.. also get to meet nice people there, crappy and nice, very friendly. Esp night shift people, got alot of activities to join one, but i always too tired for that. Guess i am too old already,after work sure cheong go back to sleep. But working night shift quite good, get to slack alot, but sometime find that i got nothing to do can be quite boring also. See, who get to complain that working can slack and still boring, (raise hand) let me be the first . hee... crappy me.

And recently very .... (mean really dot dot dot), dunno what happen to me, suddenly very very down, alot of things to say, really alot, but dunno how to say and to who to say. The world seem very very black to me, very very alien to me. Suddenly turn around me, all my fren like dissapearing, very scary. Guess been working alot, no time to catch up with my fren, that's why i wan go out also dunno who to find. This can be indeed very sad. Ask me who are thoese ppl i usually hang up with? ( i will give you this stun look and smile!) totally ignore such a question. Ask me what kind of person i am? let me tell you, i myself dunno. It's been such a long time i ever wan to go for holiday, i wan to rest. i wan to stay out of the world. i wan to sleep and dun think of anything. i wan to scream. i wan to jump. i wan a breakthrough. Very urgent. ... ... ...

Very general general intro about me,the inner thought of me dun wish to say. Too complicated. Too lengthy. Too lazy. Well fren, call me out some day to go out. i really need that.

I need a break.

Back in action

2006-05-03T13:30:00.000-07:00

Wah.... if u dunno the word being "so long", this is a very good illustration of not blogging for long enough. The reason why I blog is actually, err.. ah.. hmm.. I got nothing to do lah, haha... shh.. I am working, yes I am. But my work is like, nothing to do one loh, can sit in and msn, dunno why they pay me to come here and do nothing, ya.. it's indeed weird.
Well...These period of times that I didn't blog, actually a lot of this happen, which is good, cos if nothing is happening means something is indeed very wrong.. haha.. am I too crappy already, I guess so bah... Oh, where am i? yes, a lot of things happened. Ok, I graduated already, so ya, been looking for a full time job until now, no news. I went for an interview in the airforce, yes. AIRFORCE!!! Dun ask me again: "why you wan to sign on?" cos everytime I tell my frenz I going into airforce, their first reaction!!! Yes, what's wrong if I sign on, really that bad meh? Ask them then they say slack. Slack not good meh? Sign on is also 3 years only mah... hai... ya, even went to Napfa and medical check up, but really no news from them. Well.. think gonna keep on waiting.. See if I have the time to update all of you here when I can get in...
But I wonder who comes in and read ah? If so please tag leh.. can revive my blog anot, dun think revive also got use, seldom have the time to blog, almost forgot I have the blog to read neh… when I start to read all my previous post, was like, hey.. That's what I felt that time, but I moved on… it's really good when u look back and see urself going into another level, adapting to another different level… yeah…
What else, do u feel that I already lost my momentum to blog, lesser and lesser thing to say and excite all of you here, dun think anyone comes in and read. Good!!! Then I end here ok... hope to see you guys ard soon.

Chicken pox

2006-01-12T16:48:00.000-08:00

Too many things to blog for this moment, nothing is for me to worry because i have lifted up unto God, and i know He had taken care of. No worries. Hate the mirror!!!!!!!!! Everytime i look at the mirror and i jus dun wish to glance in the second time, can you imagine how terrible can it be. I dun want to tell people about it, i dun wan them to see me as a different world person. Why always me? Becasue it always me that my life is in the good will of God and attracts the devil?it must be.... first had dengue fever, and then followed by this stupid chicken pox. hey, had enough of it already, i dun want anymore!! pls pls.... Bad things do happen to good people.

Now gonna stay home for 2 weeks, anywhere also cannot go.... How terrible it is, cannot go for service, cannot go for ushering , cannot go to school to do proj.Now i have the whole time in the world to do what i always want to do AT HOME. =(..... Life is so miserable when my food also kena restricted. Not this, Not that. ..... yucks.... Everybod see this gonna pray for me, especially pray that i wont have scar on my face and also my proj.

I still have alot of things to say, just not in the mood to blog. I hate medicine that will cause drowsiness, i dun wan to sleep, it make me so uncomfortable, but i am very sleepy... and i need alot of rest.

It gonna be alright, i've got jesus with me.

Passion

2005-12-18T00:42:00.000-08:00

Whoa...What a great service indeed. Candle light service; very beautiful. Pastor was preaching about every single one's light within itself to shine. The darker the place, the brighter it gonna shine...Yeah... Light gives vision. Show direction clearly…When everyone start lighting the candles, it was sparkling, it was the togetherness of candles that light up that gives the place the glory. It is when everyone begin to shines the light of God, it is then beautiful in the eyes of God. It is easy for one person to shines, but as a whole exceed, it is then a miracles to the world. The key is the "togetherness". Everyone say "together".

While I was ushering, not really ushering. Was doing internal traffic, actually not much of doing work there, maybe jus help guarding the flow, hai ya, also dun no what I am doing down there...Quite like feel I am doing nothing where there is already a lot of ushers down there. Dun no why, after moving to expo, suddenly feel that been slacking cos didn't really know what to do during ushering, no longer instructions is been told to me to guard. I am so lost. Sometimes gonna stand up to be the one who really need to do something about the situation, wanna know what is going on in the comm. set holders,so that able to do the right thing at the right time, but they are too busy "comm."ing or I might not have the authority to know, I dun no. It's been really a stretch to know certain thing and dunno certain things, taking up responsibility and yet the responsibility is take up by others already. Or I should say I might not reach the certain level of communication yet. So confusing, I dun no. But thanks to xinlian over the msn, really so so so blessed to have her around, she is always so encouraging, so spiritual. It's her that make me staying positive mindset always, it's a thousand words to express my gratitude. Really need to change my mind set upon ushering, I dun wan to bring this spirit to my team. Already a lot of my team mates not doing well, but not gonna be defeats by that. Problems are something that assures me I am in the right path of God ways to lead me. Problems are always there, because my life is attracted to devil. I am gonna learn how to lead, not me, but let God be the leader instead.

I feel there is no point arguing who's right and who's wrong. It's the matter of the reason or purpose behind the thing u says or u does. It may seem chim at this point, haha.. it really need revelation to understand what I am trying to point out . XinLian told me, it is the passion sis Beatrice carries that brings her until now.

Alrite, Christmas is next week... What should I say?Oh.. Merry Christmas. Come to my mind is really bringing the lost souls in? then my next question:"then ushering how?" Hai ya...Busy ushering? Then my frenz how? Hai ya...My primary purpose is to bring my frenz lah… been busy ushering for the past few Christmas, and didn't really focus to bring my frenz in…. guilty? Somehow. That shouldn't be the way either, cos bring frenz is not for personal glory, but do u have the passion to see them get save? Yes I have. Then it's not ur work but God's work. I wanna let God lead me to what He wants me to do.

My title for today's blogging: Passion. Purpose. You.

Wonderful

2005-12-12T11:05:00.000-08:00

It had been a long weekend. Yes, moved to expo. What should I say? Excited? Because it's a greater height and definitely God is moving us into greater thing He want to revealed to us. Yes, it’s indeed a great great service for the first time. Such a big hall and yet the presence of God is even stronger, I cant denied but to admit His presence is even with us when I was in Echo terrace, Yes. The most right zone and I were impacted there. I am excited. Yes I am. Taking new team, having to meet new teammates, getting used to different style of managing things. Must really learn to be flexible. Yup, indeed this is what within every ushers, it's flexibility. I am impressed by it. Still have a lot to learn, a lot that I dunno. Indeed the sermon that Pastor Kong preached is for me. Not fear, because fear is only weapon devil's use to make us feel that we are lousy, but be confident, try out that u never know u can actually manages it. Have faith to trust in Him. My Msn nick:"When i cant His hands, i just trust Him to lead..." I dun wan to let my Fear to hinder my movement that God want to use me in. Be it in ministry or my personal evangelist. Let faith takes over my fear, I pray... Fear to lead, Fear to speak, Fear of being persecute, Fear of my future, Fear to being 1 who stand up for righteousness, I bind you in Jesus' name. Get out of my life!

Well... Love my usher mates, went to play pool with them on Sunday. Having really great time to fellowship. Enjoyed every moment. This is the time I feel where people gather not because gather, but gather together because we love each other's presence, in their own accord, and I find it's so true and so wonderful.. I get to know them better, not in ministry only, but as part of my life in ushering. This is what that wont makes ministry a ministry, but a ministry can be fun serving together, having to meet people, but of cause this doesn't make us decrease our focus on serving our God and His people. But getting to know people who can be with you while we serve, don't you think it's wonderful?

What else? Oh yes, this is my last week of having my attachments. I miss my colleagues, dun bear to leave them.. Very fast will be back in school doing my proj, hoping I wont get a proj tat required programming, it's simply too challenging for me. Pray pray. Alright, and yes, means I am graduating, and yes means going to be in workplace very very soon. Don't think I wan to get to Uni, when I prayed God jus didn't showed me. I also finds I am not into Uni first. Not ready, not prepared. Tired to study le, not I hate studying, I love to study, jus I think I need a break. My parent too, now my 2 sis is in Poly, needs to wait until we have the financial to support me to go Uni, if not she will get physically and emotionally wear out. I love to go Uni if I got the chance, but is another thing whether it is God's plan for me to be in. I want to be where He wants me to be and not what I want to. He is in a better position to see the whole pictures of life. Yup yup.

Testi

2005-11-17T12:45:00.000-08:00

Just want to share a testimonial of mine. Joy of the Lord is meant for spreading, and I want all of u to know.
this is about yesterday matters with my mum. My mum was in a bad mood after she came back from work. Because she was in a bad mood, she scolds me over those trivial matters. As usual, I never took my dinner, she scold me for that. And yesterday I was busy in my office during my attachment ,she scold so I never pick up her call, but usually I will pick up one. So she keep nagging me about my hp bill so high and not picking up her call, and talks about whatever unrelated matters to make things seems she is at the losing end. I mean, I really felt unfair to me loh,so unfair that she accuse me the thing i dun intend to do, so I so yelled back. But i regret it after that.After shouting at her, I really really felt so bad about it, so I went in to my dad's room and wanting to pray. It seem not to able focus as she keep nagging loudly, scolding and shouting. After sometimes of no reply from me, she bangs on the door and asks me to come out as she wan to vacuum the floor.Is like, i never go and argue already, even praying she dun allows. This tells me ,wherever u are ,devil knows.Even at time I want to pray most and I am unable. Continue, she shout and me, she scolds me for attending church, she scolds me that church taught me not to love parents. She blame God, she blame me. For so many times I wanted to shout back, so many times I want yell and vent my anger. but i didnt,and so i took my bible and went to my bed, I try to talk her nicely that whatever things she say about church was not true. Instead of listening, she scolds even more and louder. I understand my mum;s attitude, she is always like that, she is always stubborn. She dun litern to others but only hope we listern her only. Isnt it selfish?I cried and cried and ask God what should do; I cried at my bed, I seek God for help. At that time, it was my most difficult times for me, in my heart so many things to say, so many things I wan to tell Him, so many things I wan my mum to understand, but I cant express it. All I feel that time was to shout back and let her know how much i want her to know, but I know it will just worsen things out. I cried and cried, feeling really hopeless. Crying is all I can think of. And just God comes into mind: " You need to let your flesh dies a thousand times, remember?" this is what pastor Kong preach abt it on tue tabernacle bs, of cos i remeber. It was indeed so tough, letting my pride die, letting my attitude die, letting the whole of me die, and submit into His authority. "Don't u trust Me, don't u make a decision yesterday?"Words cant express how much it is so difficult. All my spirit is willing, lnow excactly what is the right thing to do. But jus knowing is not enough, u got to put it in action. It is easier said then done, my flesh is weakAll I do is cry, I tell myself I must make it this time. I must, if i told Him i have faith, then my flesh is been crucified, and my spirit guides me.I try to talks to my mum again nicely about the way she says it's not true.
I tell her attending church is good as they teach me good principle,it is not what as she says, and what as she thinks. I chose to follow Jesus, because I did what I believe. I really stand strong on what I said because i wan to let her know i am serious.And I can feel she knows. Every times she shout, I answer back in the nicest manner that I know how. Every time I think if God is here, what He will do. I tried and I tried. I keep telling myself to let my flesh die, and let it dies, and it dies and let it dies. It is so tough, so tough, and so tough.It's tough indeed, but I chose to believe, I control my temper and control myself from shouting. I know I won in some way, because the louder she gets, the softer I am. Eventually she get tired of shouting, and followed by silence from her. I prayed in my heart again. I tell God, whatever it is, I will stand strong, I want to stand strong. I know God put in me this situation because He knows I have the ability to overcome it. I know God me put through it, because He wants to test my faith. At least I know, my life is still attracted by the devil. I praise God in my heart.
After some times, my mum comes into my room and brings me a drink. She smiled. She never did that before. I cry again, I am so touch. She asks not to cry anymore, and ask me to go and have some food. Everything turns out to be so wonderful.I didnt expected somhow,but in some sense I expected because i prayed.I know its will not be the work of man, because yesterday I read the book of Proverbs. It says in pro 16:25, "there is a way that seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death." Man's work always end up in way of death, But God's work always bring glory. It is God's work definitely, because I know with my own strength I am not able does it. It must be Him. Praise to be His glory.After my drink, I went back my father's room to pray as I am sharing my room with my sis, and I scare she might wants to go in very often.So as I goes in, my mum asks me to go to my room because my dad's room is quite smelly. She asks me to pray in my room. (My mum knows I wan to pray, and she is open about it.) I smiled to her, and rejoice in my room secretly and indeed filled with the super real joy in me. Praise Praise to be His name. Indeed, problems draws us closer to Him and problems bring us to another level, it's a stepping-stone for us to reach His glory. Amen and Amen.

Envy

2005-11-10T18:00:00.000-08:00

I was just having a conversation with my cg member. She was having problem with her contact lenses in her eyes, so she need to take it out in order to prevent her eyes to itch. She went to see an eye specialist, he say that she had white spot in her eyes and advise her not to put on contact lenses for a while, if not she might get eye ulcer eventually. Then she asks me whether I have perfect eyesight (I do), and there we start this topic about "envies of the world."
I thought is a good topics to blog down .I got to admit I did envy my worldly friends about what they are desiring, it may be a great dream, having more time to study for exam and no need to go to church. Hey, of course I love to go to church. But I thought they are nothing to envy about as we are perusing the different things in life.. The way why others always complain that they aren't pretty or they are growing fatter, and I thought they already look great. I dun understand. Of course my member doesn't envy me for my perfect eyesight, because there is nothing to envy about it. Yes, indeed there is nothing to envy about what the world had. I went to the tabernacle bible study on Tuesday; I remember pastor told us, do not envy what the world is, for the world sees things in the natural ram. But we, having His spirit, can see through things in the supernatural ram. In the bible also says, things seem foolish in the eye of the world; it is a pleasing in God's eye. The world may not understand what we are doing, because they dun have the wisdom and the understanding from God. But we do, as Christian.
I also find that there is no end to envies. Like what I told her; Handicapped people envy the people who are able to lead a normal life; normal people envy those people who are born pretty; those people are already pretty longs to get even prettier; those people who are already pretty longs to get rich and richer… and there will be a never ending story. I wonder if people can have the every thing they want, will they want to be like God? How ridiculous.... my member told me: "well, for human nature they are just not satisfied with what they have, that's why we have emptiness. So we shouldn't envy them, since we have the greatest gift of all, that is the gift of salvation."
I totally agree with it.
Envies can't bring God's blessing in our life. Everyone does envy, or I should use the word almost. I was but not anymore. I always ask God why I end up in this situation, looking up to my friends and envy what they had and I don't. People tend to look at what others have and what others opinion; the dish in front of others always seems to be more delicious then what u had.
Envy brings us to no where. Only look at what u had, and not what u dun has. And using what u had to bring out the things u need, we call this "creative". Isn't this what pastor kong is always emphasizing. Envies bring more harm than good.
I make a decision.Not to envy, but to believe. Believe God able to use what i have,to bring the best out of me. No matter how good others worldly people may seem to be, how happy or fortunate they are. They wont have the inner joy that we are having. Because Happy is one who Lord is God! God created me just the way I am. I am letting you to envy me, u worldly world.
Have you found the real happiness my friend?

Ushering

2005-11-08T16:10:00.000-08:00

Hi people, this is me again…. See how bored can I be, I am in my attachment, and I have nothing to do. Good thing, at least during my attachment I can have some time collecting the attendance for ushers things… Lolx. Hmmm… come to collect attendance thing, I thought was easy, jus calling out some people only mah… But, some of the people dun wan pick up means dun wan pick up your call one… haiz, you know who you are lah, dun wan say names.,. hahax, but really loves my team, and ushering, it’s add colors into my life, I find that my life can be more meaningful in the way or another… maybe, it’s God’s plan for me to attach to this company.
Come to ushering, wah.. Everything seems to go from glory to glory. I only done before south IC for once, and very fast I am doing H3. I was all excited at first, really… getting in hands with comm. Set and all, conferencing… but is not about just that lah, it is about more more things, (when I say more, it’s means more) lolx… but really a very interesting experience though. I know sis huiming must be reading my blog, hopefully she wasn’t, in everyway, I must be careful in words, hahax… well well, now I know why God gave us 2 ears, when both ears are receiving information, your brain can go short circuit. I am still figuring out, how they manage to do it. I am so impress by how they can communicate so effectively, translating what they see into immediate words and actions. God gave us 2 eyes, so that one can look at east and the other west so that u can see the whole of it. (Imaging the situation, hahax, how funny) wrong interpretation I guess, God gave us a mouth because He wants us to complaint less. Oh , and I know what nose is for, it’s to smell if our zone is burning… lolx H3 wasn’t easy, plus need to supervise for zone south, it makes it more difficult. God, I know it’s tough, but I am willing, use me! I know it’s tough, but I will trust you, not about me, but it’s all about you…. Thanks to a lot a lot people there, that makes everything possible. I will learn, and definitely I wan to learn more… and I am learning…
Hmm… come to think of why I joined usher ministry? Hmm… tat was about 2 years ago if I am not wrong. That is where our cgl want us to join a ministry, I was praying, God, all I want is to serve you, what u want me to be in? Choirs? Definitely out! I can’t sing. Counselor was what I feel I more comfortable in, but is there what God wants me to be? Hmm… ushers? At first I dun wan, because like got to wear formal and make up, is what I really dun like… But I remember that time pastor preach about moving out of our comfort zone, and serve Him in your most uncomfortable time, and there is where u will grow… Usher is a ministry that doesn’t require a person to be supering talented, but all it’s takes is a willing heart. I never regret though, because I found where I belong… I love it.
Success is about passion, passion can be found in your deepest inner heart. In life, is not about doing what u like, but to like what u does. I definitely agree.

Finally...

2005-10-09T15:30:00.000-07:00

Finally.... i had the time to update my blog, not really the time that really borther me about blogging, i almost forgot my login id and password.. how funny.... I jus dun have the mood to blog. I feel it's been such a long long time i came in to blog, to some ppl 1 month may seem long ;to those everyday blogger, but 1 month can be just nice for those who rarely comes in and blog... i am those in between, how contradicting... To me, blogging jus an annocement to my frenz that i am in this season of time, please dun miss me up. i dun need that anyway.... Rarely people comes in and read too, and tat's a good thing.. hahax
Well... been busy with my exams, and it had passed long long time ago, about 3 week ago, and finally annoced i am free!!! But very soon after my 1 week holiday, i will be in my attachment. Yes, only 1 week!!! how sad... come to think of it, 1 week holiday, i never do much things also, haiz.. i know that isnt the way, maybe tat's my week for me to rest ans rest, i am too much in my comfort zone already, hahax... Actually did my homework for my attachment to come lah, at least i am doing something hor...
Come to this attachment, started up for 1 week, haiz... it's really an bad experience for me , for the first day i am already doing nothing, all they could ask me to do is to read newspaper, i dun like it... yes lah, i did some filiing up and things like tat, but it only occupied me for like maybe 1 or 2 hrs... and thes rest.. ... .. so boring. my collegue still quite ok lah, just tat they only do their works and dun wan to care about me, hahax... maybe tat's a good thing... for the second day is really fun as in my collegue bring me to UOB building in Raffles to monitor the progress for the construction of building offices, it's really a great experience, but tat's only for 1 day, hopefully next week will be a better week. Really, problems draws us closer to God.
ok, tat's all... stay tune.

recover

2005-09-05T18:00:00.000-07:00

whoaa.... Almost forgot i got a blog there need to update and do my posting... God , what happen?
Very very soon..... everything seem to pass by so soon.... everything seems to had jus about to come to an end, and i am still stuck here.... Come to think about it, nothing much to be do review about. well well, think because of my dengue fever, i waste half of my life recovering from that dengue, making me so sick and tired..... is it the effect? or the problems lies with me that i am too lazy for everything.... (hey, when i say everything, i really means everything lah....)
Some people might simply dun understand what i am writing about, hey, tat's ok... i dun think you will be the only one who dun understand what i am saying....
For people close to me know i got this mosquito sickness recently called Dengue fever, dun goes hai yo... dengue fever ah, will die one leh... everyone comes to me and tell me this, thanks for the people commenting loh, i am recovering lah... excuse me, i have God, and i know He is the healer, Amen! But tat's only a handful lah, but most of my frenz very concern about me, people like joelle, she brought herbal tea for me, although not very nice, ahem ahem** but is the heart that's counts, thanks sister, love ya.....
well... stop that dengue thing lah, really hate it, make my hand looks swollen and ugly... hate it, waste my time to eat those medicine that cause drowisness... waste my life whole day jus to sleep and do nothing, now everything was not done, and stuck with whole lotsa of things need to revise and i am not doing it.... studying makes me so sick.... Already at my last sem, and i am always complaining, when can i get rid of this habits.... i should really enjoy this period of time, my last 3 weeks of studying for my exam before i have the chance to touch books again, and there will be dunno when le, might not even will have the chance? ..... 3 WEEKS? oh no... is that good news or bad news? i got 3 weeks to finish my exam and then after that do my attachments, i always heard from people, students period is the most fun, you enjoy yourself studying and the holidays and the books... hey, i agree it. you might be very surprise, althought i dun really like to study, but that's only thing what i can do, or say i am good at.i hate working equally bad, but give me a chance to choose, i will rather stick with books.... 3 weeks, jus 3 weeks and i am done.... jus let me complain for this 3 weeks lah, i dun even have a chance to complain after this blogging, because i will be studying and studying for my exam le, dun wan spend so much time on com le, and blogging make me so sian....
Maybe after this post, you will be seeing posting on how much i miss books and studying, and people going to hate me... but now i am hating it lah... got to study le,for the time being, dun wan to think what thing i hate and what thing i wan lah... Now is the now time is to study and got good grades, at least all my frenz around me is doing this.When you see people like that, you will worry one loh, and this is what i am woryying,,, all my frenz is studying and now i am still stuck this blog thing. stupid it!
People seeing my posting, no excuse for not praying for me for my exam....
Alrite,,, wait for my good news then, wish myself a good studying weeks ahead, enjoy every moment that i am studying, and give God all the glory. Amen and Amen!

result

2005-08-19T23:30:00.000-07:00

Haloha... it's me bloggind again, after sooo long... miss my entry? I wonder who comes in and read... well.... i dun bother lah....
Life has been normal for me, and ya... Jus wanna annouce something. My common test result... whohoo... got 2A and 2B+, Prasie the Lord, i thought can get all 'A's.... but well well.... not bad lah, All glory to God, is His grace that i am able to do so well...
Yeah.. Just came back from my cell group meeting, title was" is 1 person able to make a difference?" the answer definetly is Yes, at least to me.... Let me tell you a story:
There is this one little kid at the sea side, picking up starsfish on the shore and throw it into the sea, as it is the high tide, so alot of starfish is on the shore, if they cannot get into the water, they will eventually died. So, there came this man, asking the little kid, there are hundreds of beaches, thousands of starfish, how are you able to make a difference? and tell the kid that stop wasting his time. The kid bended down and pick up another starfish. "Sir,this one make a difference." came the reply of the kid.
This is not the first time i heard of this story being told, but once again, i felt there is really something that we can learn from this story. Very often, we dispise a strength of what one person able to do, is so limited. In the bible also say, when 2 or 3 comes together in agreement, there will be power, what can 1 person do? Sometimes i wonder , i am jus 1 person? what can i do? Can i really make a difference? I also will doubt myself. I feel that making a difference is not about making a really big change into the world then it is call difference, it can start by impacting one's life. Who knows, that life you impacted may impact more lives, and slowly and assuredly, the difference you could seen. Dun look at what you dun have, but instead,look at what you have.
Making use of what you have and think what you could do to make them ueful, this is call creative. God place in us a different creativitiness. Try doing something creative today, you may discover other parts of your talent. But frenz, this is not my main message.
What i really want to say is that, 1 person do make a difference, dun despise the things one person can do. Try imapcting something positive into one's life; throwing the starfish into the sea.

Trust

2005-08-12T14:30:00.000-07:00

Yoaza... It's me blogging again.... Well, had been a long weeks... it's friday, means tml is weekend, yuppiex..... havent got back my common test result yet, i was really so scared, all my tutorial teacher come into the classroom all say our class alot of poeple fail, shit sia....out of the 5 class, ours class did most badly for the common test, everytime will have our class mention to be the worst for the modules, so sian..... i dun wan to get back my result.. Hai ya. but what to do, already did my best, i just want to leave it to God, dun ask me about my common test anymore k, i will tell you everything jus leave it to God, i did my part. That's all for my common test, next week then get back my result, i really hope i did well....
Alrite, Just wanna bring you guys a good news, my communication presentation got an A-, and my overall teamwork got B. My group is the best among my class group, Praise the Lord. the teacher keep praising our group, cos quite alot of our classmates dun really satisfied with what the score.Thanks to yining group cos she pass her powerpoint slides to us, then from there we edit. thanks to you guys....
Hallehlujah... This week is exciting lah, going through so many events, very fast exams is coming, project dued, very fast i am going to graduate, what is next for me? i dont even know, God, what is your next move for me? i wan to seek him more and ask for His guidance, going into a place where He wan me to be, and not what i want to be, for He sees a greater pictures, and He knows what is the best for me, i believe lah.
Trusting Him to guide me.

Trusting to many of us is a "big" word, saying about trusting , i still remember once i am a non-believer, i dun really trust anyone and the funny thing is that, i dun get cheated easily. Many people will ask why? I myself dunno the answer, from young, i am just that kind of people, always thinking there wont be any good people in the world, there are only people there to cheat you, to use you for good of themselves, i always have this mindset, all the people is selfish. i know is bad, but all these are the "old" me. I am not ashame to share about it because i know i am renewed by the blood of Jesus, hallehlujah.
Come to knowing Christ marks a great change in my life, not only i felt release from all the burdens i need to carry myself, means no longer using my own strength to do the work, but is He who is in me that guides me, providing me with the strength to carry on life. i felt a sense of love in the world too, and learn to trust in people, and accepting people. Hahax, come to think of it, is so long back a time, but is such a memorise..
and it's all about meeting that someone special, and accepting Him into my life.
i am so glad making this decision . What about you, my friend?

Everything over

2005-08-07T20:45:00.000-07:00

Yoaza..... Been so long never update blog le... well , life been busy for me. Today is sunday. Suppose to my usher day or FOP. wanted to serve so much, espeically in the time that they really need ushers, and i am not there...... i feel so bad... all because of my mummy loh, she scolded me for coming back so late on friday and saturday, and then need to wake up so early on sunday. i never blame her, because i know she concern about me, but she always dun understand..... hai ya.....i want to serve, dun rob away my blessing for God... hahax.
Although now so tired and sleepy, but been so great serving the Lord, so proud to say i am part of the team being one of the ushers,helping people ,coming early and helping prepare the indoor and stuff, felt so blessed. Yay... Although i felt didnt really do much as in filling up the empty seat as they will have so many people wanting the seat so much, i dun think we are needed to be there, hahax. But is an experence ushering in the indoor stadium as the people not from our church, in a way different manner of handling the situation. i think xinlian did a great job on this, got to learn so much from her, she really someone i look to.
ok.... that's for now. Felt so release right now. finally common test is over, what a relief.... so happy, dunno if i did well, i hope i did, at least did my best. But really make so many careless mistakes, one question forgot to square the equation, the other question forogt to square root it, isnt it funny?
Funny is the word of life i guess..... Life is full of uncertainties, God prepare us the skills to handle it, it's up to us to discover what God had put into us. the more you try, the more you know, also the more failures you will met. Succes is not about one time event, how you measure success?

Success to me is about having a good grades, going into good schools,finding a good job, if life are like that, wont it be boring? no vision, no purpose? In bible say, when people have no vision, people perish. Can you see how easy poeple perish, jus merly exsiting life, live because they are given a life, and so be it, in a way of no choice then they shall live, how pathetic is that?
Find your meaning in life, my friend. There is only one person, He is the way of truth, the way of life.He is none other then Jesus.
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. Friend forever.....

dinner

2005-07-25T23:45:00.000-07:00

Wow..... it been a while since i updated my blog, suddenly know soo much things.... so many people were reading my blog and yet i dunno... hmm.... what am i doing.. hahax, well, what can i say, thanx for visiting, and hope you guys enjoy your stay, and something got to say, must write more spiritual stuff le hor sis wenhui and sis huiming,.... hahax. must keep my words rite from now onwards, and my tagboard people, write more positive words to encourage leh, make my blog meaningful can, is a public website now, though i never advertise for it... hahax.
Okies.... what is for today. i started my so called "study week" le, but as can say, is inverted commas, and so means a short holiday for me, wahaha....oops, sorry... keep to positive words pls... oh, what can i say, today i got study wor, meet my frenz in school to study, but to be honest, not really so call fruitful, as in was planning for the activities we going to have on friday, and what we are going to do after our common test and stuffs, (who knows with frenz like that we no need devil to distract us? yes? )hahax.... was planning a steamboat outing for my class lah, was looking forward to it, cos was gathering my ex classmates, hopefully all are able to turn up, miss them, longing for a fruitful fellowship...
well.. saying abt fruitful fellowship, what marks my day today wasnt the studying of cos.... (hey, what is the meaning by adding the of cos in, i wan to study to glorify God and really done well de leh, people readin this, no excuse for not praying for me k).... ok, where am i dragging the topics to??? hahax. ok, today went out with my team IC and section Ic in my usher ministry in church to have dinner together..... quite excited about it, went to this place call the " seah street deli" i think,a place in the raffles hotel. was my first time there... quite a nice place, what impresses me wasnt the environment at first , but was service they gave and the attitude they had, is really something that i was quite amaze, and something i can learn.... the whole package of the resturant give me a impression of 80's style, quite intersting... the people there was friendly, they celebrated the costumers birthday as if is one of their frenz, is something that gives us a very warmth feeling, very nice of them too.... ok, enough of that.... today i enjoy myself alot, first time having dinner with the leaders in usher ministry, was thinking quite stress at first, got to be very spirtual, hahax...but sis wen hui and they all is very easy to fellowship, we laughed and chatted, not relating to ushering stuff, is something i felt 'hey is not abt everyweek duty people that we meet and go kind of frenz, "but really someone we can build frenzship on..... really alot of things to learn from them..... thanx people, you guys mark my day. So wonderful to know so many nice people around, ushering together knowing i am not alone serving God, but as whole we unite.... not good at words though, but i know u guys know what i meant, Thank you soo much... i know you all make time to make this dinner happen. hahax.... very nice of you all....
the people that went: Bro chee wei, sis huiming, sis wenhui,sis beatrice,sis ivory, xin lian, chun hui, sugianto and me. heex.. total 9 of us. nice dinner we had together.
okok.... got to go to study le, i want to score well for my common test, wont be updating so soon after this posting, so anyone happen to see my blog, must must pray for me, becos i know prayer works, and i know God hears our prayer, and i know prayer moves mountain, and it happen if we had faith even like mustard seed. so dun hestitate to pray, jus need to take up a few mins of ur prayer time to pray for me. hahax... thanx a millions.
and very very soon, got to hear great testimonies from me in my studies, so stay tune....... ;)

lllll

2005-07-11T23:50:00.000-07:00

Well.... requested by someone to update my blog, now then realise i so long never blogged. But been really not feeling well these few days, also dunno why, been coughing, then followed by headach and then whole body felt weak, dun feel like moving.....Just feel like lazeing around, enjoy the beautiful sky, and stuck there to keep my mind blank at least for some moment. I think this is call resting, i just enjoy being just like that. What can i say?not feeling well? not my day loh, common test coming up, Napfa coming up, how am i going to pass my Napfa? got to buck up in my training i guess. When will i be free to do my running, guess this will be another question. Hahax.... not trying to avoid k, is just not the mood to think about it.

No topic to blog, No mood to blog...... In my heart, something burdening me. Hey hey, dun start guessing what is it. Is not about you, is just me. Maybe i guess is my studies, really unable to cope, and too many things to handle. But there are times when i really want to open book and study, hey, tat's another story. Seems like all the things i know,when i begin to start to do the question, then start to find what is the formula to use. Hey, i am too lazy for that, or jus that i am too weak. I dun wan give excuses lah.

hai ya, worrying for my interview on thur, got to go school in my formal wear. Not because of that i start to worry, wearing formal can say is kind of a common thing for me, as in every week i am wearing it. But the prob is, wearing formal, going to school, and need to do a presentation as in being interviewed, it makes me nervous. But at least i feel is a good thing, prepare ourselves for a real interview after i graduate. hmm.... what i am going to do after i graduate, haiz... i think that will be another story for me to think as well....

hey , that's life.Full of chocies and decision, But i believe life is more then that. Getting a cert, finding a job secure with a good monthly salary, get married and have 2 kids. Be satisfied and wait to die.
Life itself is a mystry, so much things to be discover, and yet people wonders. How funny?

Hey, i am just a human being like you and i. -not perfect

ppppp

2005-07-08T13:30:00.000-07:00

Today let's continue the topics on purpose...... hey you all get sick of my post? i hope not. hahax. Well... today not only will be touch on purpose, but also on provision. In what way? Yesh! When we begin to to discover our purpose, we will be provied as well, by God. Isnt it wonderful?
Dun doubts God when He begin to prompt you to do something or called you to do something, your ability or your resources may not be enough for you to see with your own physical eyes, but believe in me, God does provide with us the resources and also the tools to do it. In Eph1:11, God delight to see us walking in His purpose . And dun doubt God for what u are lacking of, you might say but but but......i am not smart enoguh, i dunno how to even speak properly.... But the fact is, we are already choosen to accomplish the purpose God had placed in us before the foundation of the world, before any circumstances are there to distrupt us. Despite of we are going to face in what the world will be coming against us, God had already placed a purpose inside of us, and for the difficult situation we are facing, trust in God that he will provide.
God choose you to be the first choice, and not the second choice!
What is purpose then? -Purpose is the original reason for the creation of a thing. E.g: car is created for transport, hammer is created to be atool for construction. And every creation carries potential. Potential will come in purpose. We all see before a lorry, yes? Lorry able to help to transpot goods, it has the potential able to substain weight and carry haevy stuff.
As we discover where out potential is, you will know the purpose had give in ur life for you to accomplish. God put in us the potential to fulifill the purpose. Your potential might be hidden, u got to discover through trying and finding.
Phil 4:13 "You can do all things through Christ who strengthen you. "All things? what is all things to you? all things to you may be only your studies, so God can only bless you in your studies. Often, God dun limit us to what we are doing, is always we limit God on what He can do for us. God give us a blank cheque . All for me is ALL. my studies, my family and everything. Let's God handle your all things. believe and trust in Him. Dun limit God on what he can do, he can do exceedingly, abundantly above all that we ask or think.

Purpose and Provision

2005-07-07T22:04:00.000-07:00

Purpose

2005-07-04T01:05:00.000-07:00

Today, i am going to talk about purpose. Everything was created in it's own purpose.Let me start with:" What is the purpose of having a blog?" that's a good question! To me, it's not a daily dairy where by just come and type a few words of what u go through for the day, magnifying how unlucky or how blessed you are. i mean that's great lah, i believe it's created not just for that only, but also beyond what it can be done. -imapcting poeple's life by publishing something that is positive and of cos meaningfull lah....
Hey, that's my purpose for this blogging today. i am excited to start. -The Law of Purpose. 1.Everything in life has a purpose. Dun tell me u are born oit of monkey lah, although u may look like one, behave like one or talks like one, but the fact that God created you, hey, He had place some kind of uniqueness in you that others dun have, and you and only you alone can be fulfilled the task, isnt it so honoured to be someone like this, and this is the good news now, you are that someone... wee~~
2.My purpose is in the mind of God. You may wonder what is ur purpose since i am talking until so big, hey, you may not know it now, but i definetly is in the mind of God, seek Him more ,open up your heart and God will reveal more of His purpose to you, i am also trying to seeing it though.
3.My purpose is constantly and unceasingly calling out to me. In fact, you are not finding your purpose, but your purpose finding you. Purpose is something like calling, when u do something, u will felt whether is the calling for you to do this, ur spiritman must be sensitise to ur Holy Spirit, and you will know it.
4.Where purpose is unknown, abuse is inevitable. I agree with it. Like morphine, or something sounded similar to it, it is a thing whereby doctors nowsaday use it very often for operations to kill pains, and it is definetly a great help is all hospitals today. But where purpsoe is unknown, where there will be abuse, youngster now use it as a drug, and we called this drug abuse. Do you think is so sad, knowing your purpse is so important.
5.My ability and nature predict my purpose. ya.... God will ask a person who cant dance to be a dancer, and say that, hey that's my calling. First, your calling must be something u have passion and you are good at it. somewhat or somehow, i know u know.....
6.What i have passion for predict my purpose. is link with the previosu one, u gotta like what you do mah, ta's ur purpose.
7.Purpose brings with it the anoiting for maximum success.Hey, totally agree with it man..... Anoiting= power to perform excellence.; flowing to where ur spiritman guides... mind o mind, the anoiting is powerful.... boy o boy, pray for the anoiting today, is so impt today that when u wanna have the maximum success. When u have the anoiting, everywhere you do, defienlty will propser.
8.My purpse will prosper me and the kingdom of God. To all christian out there, ur purpose must benefit the church and defienlty must make u prosper, Hey, ur purpose must be positive lah, dun tell me ur purpose to be a bad person in this world.... haha,funny in the sense, but very unlogical loh, is like , we never dream to be a theif, but ur purpose must be something that is cpnstructive de lah.... i know u get what i mean lah....
9.Where my talents and the needs of the world intersect, therein lies my purpose. Your purpose also somehow links to ur gifted talents, like what i say, whether are you good at this particular thing? or u jus do becos everyone is doing it, ur purpose may not be a leader, u are created just the way u are, maybe be an good assistant is the purpose for you..... Everyone is created so uniquely, and everyone is gifted in ur own unique speacilise.
I am gald if you find yours, I will be praying for the people that havent find one, you will find it soon. the only way to maximise ur greatest potential is of cos find the one who created it. Like a televsion, u got to know how to use it best by reading the handbook, the inventor had wrote. is the same thing in life, u got to find the person that creates you, and He will tell you what you can do to the best that you could. And i know you know who is that person to be. He.

Conversionist

2005-07-01T14:30:00.000-07:00

well..... it's me blogging again... What should i say this time round.... hmm.... not really have a topics to blog, jus feel like nothing to do then come and and blog here and there, my lesson end early today, yuppies.....
Nothing much happen these few days, just normal school day life..... it kinda bored me out too..... "it's a thing to say, it's another thing to act." How far can you agree? is not writting a compose i guess, but i just felt this phrase keep appearing in my mind, so i jus wanna discuss it out.
For me, i agree lah, somehow.... when some people jus said it, they didnt really meant it, and they will feel regret after saying it,sometimes i am like that too. Words are like water, once it pour out how can you collect it back, if u want it, i will never get the full amount of it as in ;when u said a word that hurt somebody, even if u apologise, it will not appear as in you had never said that. Words are powerful, so frenz, be careful of what u said.
Dun you find that just a human being itself, is a powerful creation? God had created us powerful yet some people are destroying itself. how do i define powerful? Jus a human's mind alone, we can think and imagine the things beyond what we can reach, isnt it powerful? God didnt limit us on what we can think and imagine, if u can imagine you becoming a singer or a pop star, it may seems impossible, but how wonderful to come and think of it.... we may be limited on the physical abilities, i dun mean the phyical disabled people, but for me, i am a person that dun dance so well, but how i wish i could be an dancer.... My focus definetly is not on what i want to become lah, is jus an illustraion on what our mind can reach beyond our reach.....
Ya, some people ask me, since you say your God is so great, and how come some people end up to be begger or what..... is like you are telling me, there wont be people with messy or untidy hair because there is a barber,and you will tell me it's because they refuse to get their hair treated. Same to here, there is a God for us to believe, and yet people refuse to come to Him. He is a God that provide, and definetly you must trust and believe he can help you lah..... What i wan to say is not another religious thing for you to believe what i belief lah.... is a saying that you know something is good and you just want to keep it to yourself, i find it this is selfish lah...... i believe my God is a good God, and i want you to know....
How am i come to this point.. haha, God give us not a mind to think, But He creat in every single one a certain amount of ability to be creative and be productive, is how we make use of it.... Who knows that money is good? how do i know that? Because is what God had created, am i rite. And what is the world today, the misuse the money and become something that can be threaten and because of this, many innocent lifes had been killed. Money intention to be good, and see how creative man can become using what we had to create something , instead of posiive , it become negative, money definetly is not the cause, it's the creativity of man.... Money can be useful, come to charity and helping out many peoples.....Afterall,money is just a piece of paper, what harm can it cause, but people are fighting all over jus for that. i am not praising for that to happen lah, is jus that, taking a step to rest and discover the what he world had become. took another step to think of it, it come by the power to imagine, and God dun put limit on imgination, i wonder what will become after few years down the road, may the world become more creative and come out with something more powerful? that's what conversionist are for, - to change the thing back to God's originated purpose, it will not gonna be easy, but we must try...... Always i know there will be a way......

choose life

2005-06-27T00:00:00.000-07:00

Alrite, decide to blog again after so long..... Dunno start from where, been really long never blog although is only 1 week, but seems that so much thing had happen, the thing i dun wish to happen, the thing i hope to happen.... so confuse....
well. finally get to see a person blog, what can i say? hmm...... i wan to keep the comment for my self, dun wish to publish out in public... alrite, been a long week, busy with my project and schoold works, coping well, just that feel abit stress now although is only week 4, well..... jus too bad, i dun like specailisation....
Nothing much i want to say really.... dun feel like blogging cos i dunno what else to write, something i want to say, but jus dunno how to say, or i am jus lzy to write..... hey, i apologise.
Pastor Kong say, life is compose my choices...... i agree some how, what we choose is what we will get and we need to bear the consequences of our choices..... but some people just cant get what they choose, what you will say if a person born out to be a crippled or blind, or born deaf..... would u say, : "that's too bad.." hey, i am not that bad, i sympatise them, but i felt is rather unfair. well, you would say they are born like this so that God can mould them in another area, that such a great ideal, why dun it be you? you doubt. No no.... it doesnt happen to me in anyway, really.... jus felt like saying, thought some might think what had happen to me, "excuse, i am fine.." i am like that one lah, jus some thoughts i felt like sharing.... i know is some how negative, but u never know.... God had a greater plan, you never know..... God's thoughts are always higher....
oh.. where am i? lost track..... okok.... i really want to be excited in life , i really hope i can. i know i can. is my choice what.... i can choose, and choice carries power in your life and mine too,you choose to be what u become. In the bible say : choose life....

......

2005-06-19T22:50:00.000-07:00

Finally have the time to blog again...... what a day today, just came back from shi hwee's house today, really had a great time of fellowship with them, so long since we last time really gather together and chi chat again, (is a gathering of my secondary school people; summer, chu ki, shi hwee , my sis and me) yaya, so many things to talk about, everyone had really changed alot, not only in what they look, but also the way they thinks.... people really do change. Still remember shi hwee was a person who are really stubborn about things and always wan to achieve the best in life, but from the way i see her now, she already become a mother of a 2month old baby, and the way she looks at things, i believe is so different from us too, she looks so mature now, and i can say, i really glad for her as in she found her happiness and settled down, and really knows what she really wants in life. Times really pass, looking back at thoses things i should have done and shouldnt had done, is all too late to say, well.... we make a decision in what our life is gonna to be, no one else, you choose the way you want it to live. Life only once, live it to the fullest, or you are just merely exiting .
Life is so full of unexpectancy, i dunno if this word exits, but what i really feel about life, some people will say life are so wonderful (one of my frenz msn nick: Life is so great for me, i'm loving it) well..... while other might think that tat's end of the world for them, well i guess it's really your own perspective towards life, how you look at life in different angle, whether a cup is half filled or half empty. For me, i admit i am thoses kind of person that's always look it as half empty cup, i am more to negative mindset person, of cos i know is not good to think this way. Life is full of changes and full of negatives, i cant denied i am not influenced by the negative of the world, and i need to change. When a bad situation comes, i always think it's against me first, rather then to think it's there to mould me so that i can be stronger person and to overcome it. I really need to change the way i think serously, people around me, i pray you wont be influenced by me, and of cos i pray people reading it will be praying for me as well..... Life can be exciting when you choose to let it be. My friend, Live life the fullest today, i pray......

......

2005-06-16T20:30:00.000-07:00

Fine!! finally update my blog le, dun even know kolina always come in to see my blog. Hahax.. i thought nobody will wans to come in, been so busy these few days, hmm..... school jus started and everything was seem to be coming against me, so many things to do, dun even have the time to breathe..... I hate to complain like that, i know is not good. Maybe at first i choose the wrong specialisation, i really hate it man,why everybody tell me now that my choice of specialise is difficult, i already inside this course le, so wanted to have a chance to change my speicialise again. i know everything is too late , too late to say. I want to change!!! i want to change to, hmm... Automation!!! but, too late. But i really hope to score well in what i am rite now, stop dwelling in the past, and now what i can do is to so my best of what i could rite now, Amen!
Yay.... i want to stay positive in what i am rite now.... i really hope i can, always felt that i am so alone in everything, i miss my last sem classmates, i miss their laughter, now this new class..... not really say dun like, jus not my type, cos they dun really joke very much, they dun laugh the way we use to laugh, wahhaa..... well... what can i say? Just not my sem, nahz...... they are there maybe just to mould me, in everything, got to trust in God in what He will use me in this class. I am excited. i want to be excited. I am excited. Keep on praying for me, May God bless you the way He bless me. praying the best for you.
Always i thought there will be a way......

Emerging

2005-06-10T15:15:00.000-07:00

Yowza..... it's me blogging again, wondering why i went missing these few days? well...... there was so many intersting things to do, and i got so much to things to tell... First , i would like to start from the POS, clap clap for NYP warriors.... dun you think they done a great job? we can say really we did our best for this performances, was so confidence that we will be in top 3, the performances was so good loh, when i am the one performing, i can see the crowd really cheering for us. and after everything, we are still excited that we will be in leh. But well well, we never get in, try harder next year. i really hope to get our champion position back again. Yeah..... it was so great joining Pos,so fun and exciting, knowing alot of wonderful sisters and brother in christ. Alrite, and the emerge conference this year was a super super ..... what can i say, "great"? is far far more then what this word describe, so wondeful, so excellent, was so like hmm.... the presence of God is so strong, and we cant denied but to admit He was really there with us. it is not words can describe, i believe the people who went know it, and definetly will agree with me. such a longing for more of Him, and it is not what word can say, but you got to experience it yourself..... i simply loving it. This was only jus for the first nite, just imagine the first nite was so great, you still need to hear from the second and third nite? i dun think i need to say much, it's simply so awesome. But the really"too bad" thing was that i am able to attend for the nite session only, my lesson all end quite late, but i really enjoy myself, is not about enjoying, but is about enlarging our capacity, and stretching our faith towars God. It is not about i, me and myself, but about the Holy Spirit tat's is in me, what He can do in me!Praise the Lord.
yeah.... is really not about excitment, in this conference really feel the substance of the presence, chaning the world, being a conversionist, is not about saying but doing. I like the melay song, although is my first time sing malay, but it really carry the strong anointing of God, i like the last sentences.. ku ada untuk menjadi penyambahmu... it means we exits to be a worshipper... whoaa.....
the emerge conference dun just end here, it continues as we desire for more of His works in our life, everyday is an emerge for God, Let's emerge~ hallelujah...
Alrite, been so busy because of my school, so many things to do. i choose the wrong specialisation already, haiz.... but i believe God had put me here for a purpose , dun question why, but since i am in, i gonna make a decison to put in my best shot, in the most difficult situation comes a greater glory for God.... i got to enjoy all my tough tough modules, it will be so challenging, pray for me.... Lolx
well.... back to my tag, i dunno who is that anti-blogger is, but i myself have a suspect lah. wont say out is who.... but i just feel that, deleting away the entries doesnt change the world being negative, the world itself is negative, of cos i know, we are in this world and not of this world, by all, deleting away entries doesnt help much, i can delete all i can, but it can always write again.Do you thinks it help? i admit i might be negative inside my blog, and i am not proud it lah, but thanx for reminding, will stay postive in the best that i could, i got to admit sometimes i am more negative, i really got to change also, all you can do is by praying for me. thanx thanx, and ya, if i gonna delete my old entries, then people wont be able to see the changes in me , i want to stay positive, Lolx. Life is full of imperfections, mans too..... Let's us not focus on that, looking upon what you have and not what you dun have!

blogging

2005-06-02T00:20:00.000-07:00

Blogging? again? yes, it's me blogging again. Well, blogging seems to me more like doing chores rather then out of interest, because nothing better to do? yes, i guess so.... Lolx not really because of nothing better to do? i dun really know the needs to blog, i dun wanna advertise what i am going through, i dun find it a need to tell people what i have been doing the whole day, the sequence of the day, from brushing teeth to changing pajamas to sleep? dun you find it boring? maybe to me i guess. then in the first place why i created a blog? That's a good question! hmm.... maybe everyone had one, i also wan to have loh, hey.. that's a typical singaporean answer, kiasu loh, the queue is long, there must be something up there, i also wan to queue kind of mentality. haha? isnt everyone doing it....
well, to me. I find that blog shouldnt be a kind of thing whereby people jus post what they do for the day, but is about their thoughts towards certain things, maybe they have a word to say, and theses thing we dun really speak to a frenz or really do much chatting to a frenz , agree? my english wasnt that good, but i hope you people can understand what i am trying to say over here. Overall, how you get to know a person better, is not about him/her telling you what he/she had been doing , maybe he is schooling in this particular school, but it doesnt tell you what the personality of this person really is. What i am trying to say was that, maybe for me to get to know this person better is really by the way he/she thinks, she behaves... tat's what i am really concern about building friendship, true? You can no need to agree with me, afterall, this is only what i feel, maybe u had a word to say, everyone had it's opinion, and i definetly will respect it. Ya.. blogging is a way i feel a way to express your thoughts even in a more clearer pictures whereby people can know the thoughts towards you? at least what are u thinking or feeling. tat's y, blog are intersting with intersting people like me. Hey, you got to agree with that, i am interesting!! heex....
Alrite, tat's only my introduction. whey, are you tired to continue reading? Do you know that eyes need rest after a certain period of time. guess i am gonna stop here........
ok, this is for people who really want to hear from my life. Lolx.... Basically, nothing much today, went for practise as usual, was tiring, my lesson end at 12 today, got to know more of my classmates, and even get to know them even better, i think tat's a good news. Praise the Lord for that. I guess i chose the wrong specialisation, the modules seems so difficult to me, need to pray for more wisdom to be upon me le. yeah..... i am tired of typing, think really got to stop here. i hope you enjoy your stay. Lov ya....

................

2005-05-31T00:00:00.000-07:00

I want to be what i want to be. I am not happy about it, dun ask me to act as if nothing is wrong. pls... i dunno! i am not a born actor. i hate things that need to be said, and nobody is voice-ing out. What is this? hey pls lah, people also got spend effort one loh, and what is this? the people dun really spent their time doing get all the credit,jus because they are talented, and we didnt even have a chance to try. and what are we in the end? just script off loh? hey, excuse me? u know what is time? hard work? effort? because you are not the one. Hey, i am not trying to oppose anything. i am jus not happy with the matter. i am not happy! buai song. seriously , i am not trying to be rude. tat's me, hey, i say in the starting, i dun like to be what i dun wan to be. being happy jus because i have to, No way!
I really want to get this matter rest, but i couldnt force myself to, i am stubborn . got to admitt. i am so sorry. Jus dun wanna mention what is this matter, i dun wan anyone to know either. is about me against my pride i guess....
well..... today is my first day of school, didnt really have much to talk about. Jus that nobody is same class as me, got to know this new classmates call rachel, a very nice ger...... well. ny classmates dun seem to be very friendly lah, hopw to really know them in person. haha, pray for me bah.

............................

2005-05-26T01:05:00.000-07:00

ahem ahem** it's me blogging again. Today jus got my timetable, not really satisfied with it, although dun have nite class, but i dun have an off day neither. How is wish i can have nite class, and give me a whole day free.... oh my gosh, got to go through this for one sem, oh nooo...... i got 2 days got to wake up at 8am. gosh.... gonna look like panda le, i wan to rest. i got 2 days lesson until 6pm. How am i going to survive, some people help me please..... i dont want, i dont want. please please please......
well well.... timetable is out means no changes. less of my complains and more of the thinking what should i do next? as if i do so much complains it helps. Saying people ugly didnt make me look prettier, saying other people stupid dun make me seems smarter. i dunno, i suddenly think of it. but making complaining really makes me feel so much better. Hey it ryhems. haha..... but complaing wont make any changes, i am genius. it ryhems so well. repeat the poem with me, com'on.... Saying poeple ugly didnt make me look prettier, saying other people stupid dun make me seems prettier, but complaining makes one's feel better, but it dosnt do any changes. i felt so lame, can someone laugh after reading this. "hahaha..." really cannot make it sia...
alrite, where am i. ya, about the timetable thing, well dun talk about it lah, dun even buys books yet, guess i am not ready for school to reopen. Schools is starting soon, i dun even knows who is in my class, really need serious prayer to help me, hope get thoses really nice people in my class. plus this year is my last year, need to do my final year project, really got to pray for my classmates to be thoses super nice to work with one, if not, i really got to suffer through. God, let Your grace be upon me, in everything, i know remnant will happens. haha..... for people dunno what is remnant, ermm... go and check a dictionary. lolx....
haix.... is so late again at nite, tml is another day of my training for POS, omg, guess what, got to reach church at 10am. How am i going to make it, schoold is starting soon, this i know, no need so fast practise to wake up early ritex. Holidays always seems so short, and busy day always seems so long, when is my next holiday? i am waiting. when the angels is perfect, when i am perfect. it will be ...... the time of no such things. this is the lamest of what i can think rite now. Laugh to encourage me, thanx thanx.....

long enogh

2005-05-24T00:30:00.000-07:00

well.... what to start off from today... been so long never want to blog. that was one time, come in blog a few sentences and then erase off then rather dun blog it seems so funny, blogging becos of blogging, like nothing to say also blog kind. man......... must well forget it, but blog what, lame also tell people what i am now, at least how lame my life can be loh. tat's why i am here today.
ok, where am i now. today went to my frenz house do banner for my POS, well... busy day, correcting the space, designing, alot of work to be done, and really can see our effort putting off, quite nice done lah. well, quite satisfied with it, today felt fruitful. ya.... that's my day loh.
for the past few days, well.. i lazy to think about it wor..... so u know it, tat's good. dunno it, hmm... if u wanna know. ask me loh. hahax. arggg.... i am soo lame.
i dun feel like blogging. i am tired of it. tat's it. No one is perferct, dun expect me to be.

lalala

2005-05-19T01:40:00.001-07:00

Seriously, not in the mood to blog. not in the mood to sleep, (now is 1plus in the morning), not in the mood to do anything. Haiz.... dunno how come end up to this state? I am so vexed rite now, really tired but not in the sense of sleepy. Tired of what life really are, training for POS, making me so tired... haiz, so many things cropped up. For the time being , i dun really want to think what happen next, what i should do. I wanna keep my mind blank,as simple as possible. But it's soo difficult.
I think this is the blog that i express how i feel soo well, never really know what my mind wants and what my hands is typing. How funny is it? I myself dunno. So confuse on what i really wants. As i am saying, jus dun think about it.
OK, really got to stop the craps, or crabs. oh, that makes me really hungry. hmm.... never went to POS training today again, or should i say yesterday. Ya, becos i by the time i know it, it's already too late for me to rush down... well, dun wanna find excuses lah, is really becos of my tiredness so i never go down. I am sorry!!! Ya, and ya.... what i wanna say? so sorry, i forgotten. hmm... school are starting soon, i should be happy as in i really got things to do, if not i dunno this rotting kind of lifestyle will continue for how long, haha.... But my school start, everything is new to me, i am going into my 3rd year;my specialisation.And gotta have my new classmates, got to start everything afresh again. means got to make new frenz,got to study with them. i really hope to have a bunch of good classmates, able to joke and have fun while studying. Can start praying for me now le. haha....excited to see my new class.
well, come to think of it, still got like 2 weeks, dun even know my timetable yet. Hopefully everything will be turn up to be just fine. Updates again..... Angels are not perfect, dun expect me to be!

it's sunday

2005-05-15T13:05:00.000-07:00

It's sunday today, woah.... got up at ard 12 plus. was really tired lah, so..... everyday seems so tired to me. well well........ what to do.... eh.. dunno what to blog today, now was in a tired mood, so tired until i dunno what to write sia... Lolx!!
talk about the ushering yesterday, well, was sitting at the overflow room, cant get a chance to get to the audit cos i am doing greeters, and then when time to go down, the audit was so pack even the stairs cant squeeze people already..... so no choice, go overflow room. But come to offering time, i get a chance to hold the buckets to the front and prayed for the offering, it's so great being at the front, the presence of God really so strong , esp when people come running infront to give, it really touches my heart. Praise the Lord!
what else to say? it's sunday! Enjoy it.

I am soo tired.....

2005-05-14T12:15:00.000-07:00

Yeah... it's saturday today. i slept until so late then wake up, later gotta go church, yeah, i am gonna serve. well.... i almost unable to serve today, i havent blogged for so long, because this few days quite alot of things happen.... haiz... dunno start from where, well, my family is going through some really serious matter, my mum and dad quarrel , then my dad is so angry with my mum that he almost can kill us sort, so my mum and my sisters all moved to my aunt house and stayed, and so this is the reason i have been missing from my blog le... haha, usually will try to blog everyday becos i am soo free, it's holiday! yeah.....
Alrite, back to where? yaya.... the reason i almost cant serve is because, i never brought my formal clothes there, so haha.......i have been so tired these few day, dunno doing what also. Haha... i missed POS training for like 2 days, never go on thur and fri, and so.. yaya, because due to my family thing,so dun have the mood for training also.... i missed so many things, and i dunno where to start again. not actually referring to the training, but really things in life that i missed. haix.... what to do................
i have soo much to say, so much to blog, but the time being... my mind is so blank. i dun wish to think further, i jus want to stay where we are rite now. What happen? why arent you happy about what it is rite now? i really dunno what u wan? Please..... i am sorry!

busy

2005-05-11T15:15:00.000-07:00

today, haha.... quite a busy day, at home also dunno do what also call busy, lolx..... i am that funny de lah, haha.... well well... today busy about my blog thing loh, the words and all.. linking my frenz and all, and i am helping my frenz with his blog as well.... haha, i am soo helpful. helpful me, hahax... alrite alrite. yaya...
now my leg aching sia, yesterday POS training until my leg sooo pain, cant walk today so stay at home to rest, sit until my chair so hot rite now, oopss.... Lolx... who cares man..... whooa..
I am just thinking about few thoughts in my mind, it seems so bothering me, but i jus dun want to think about it anymore.... haiz.... i also dunno what happen to me?? i really dunno..... i really really dunno, what should i do? or what i had done? i am sorry if i done anything wrong? i am really sorry....

new blogskin

2005-05-11T01:30:00.000-07:00

Yeah.... finally a new blogskin! if not people will keep saying my blog so childish plus the song, twinkle twinkle.... pls loh... so thanx to my sis, she help me change a new blogskin. i kinda like this anol, dunno why... is soo cute, look at that boy on your left. issnt as cute as me.... Lolx... Well... this blog still gotta improve, maybe te word when u start enter the blog, gotta change.. people, any suggestions? Well... now at least got the tag board le, if not cannot post up ur comment.. poor you.... haha..
well... one thing i hate and like about this blog is this blog dun have any songs on it. Did you people notice? i hate it when i dunno how to put song in it,it make it so dull.. the thing i like about it was that, i ever heard before this story saying about this concert, but this concert dun have any music on songs, and make people listern to the environment for dunno how log, a certain time. And when it ended, everyone stand up and applaused. firstly i was amazed when i heard it, then i know from my frenz that it dun really have music or song to know how well the song is . it is the silent that contrast with the music make it nice, and so.... silent make a important part. Still cant get it? is like having good and bad people, is only we know what kind of people is bad, then we know how the good people are. yes? is only we know silent, then we know what good song or music is. so i really dun mind whether it got song anot. i just like silent, where people can really relax, and dun think about too much stuff i guess..... some song maybe too sentimental kind, got thoses sad sad kind of feeling..... what make life so miserable, my blog gives people the freedom to choose whatever they mood they wan? isnt it great? the more i say the more i feel more like it.... i soo like my blog... lolx. I am not perfect. are you?

happy mother day

2005-05-09T01:05:00.000-07:00

First of all... i wanna wish all mother a very "happy Mother's Day", they work hard and they deserve that. Maybe not all mothers are good, i mean there are relly those "not good " mother lah, but definitely not my mum, i love her.. really, she sacrifice soo much in my family.. without her, i dunno what will really happen to us. I dun have a really good dad, and ya.... dun wish to toks abt that, people knows me will know about that, ah ya..... when times come, you will know why.. ya, main things not abt him lah, it's my mum that i really want to thanks her.... Mummy, i love you....
i today cook for her, should use i, is we. me and my sisters. we cook spag for her.. i know is simple to cook, but in the sense we add quite alot ingredients so ya... very delicious one loh.... my mum likes it alot, hee hee... we also got buy chicken loh, she also love to eats.. hee heex, i see her so happy i also happy le. i am so happy today. Mummy , hope you enjoy urself today too....
Well....today that is this someone ask me about this particular question.I was in the sense, surprise mix with confuse, plus abit of i dunno. stun to be the actual word. i dun really know the answer yet,or maybe because i also dun have a answer myself, and so i pretend myself through that i never hear it... Lolx... and really make that person pissed off.... I am so sorry for that, i am really sorry. what could i say, is like everything is at a time where i dunno what thing is going to happen and wha is i going to respond is the sense that it will be good or correct , or maybe of the best to the situaition. is so dfficult to explain in just plain words, it's need time to go through, it's need effort to make it happen and it definetely need more then alot of things ..... i dun really know how to explain, but what i could say is that i am just not ready for so many things. what i am going to do, what i am going to think about...... is just another question i know.... it need commitment, time and energy.... I just dun wanna think about too much for the time being, let time help me get over it.... and oh... what i really want to say it that, i did really treasure the time we chat, and ya..... u are really appreciated. touching ah... lolx
ok.. that's about all for today. Everyday is just so beautiful, and i need more of it.

usher

2005-05-08T02:00:00.000-07:00

where should i start? haiz... not a good day for me.... actually started today very excitedly, because today was ushering to be a IC for west de, i do not really good actually, or should say i dun like my performance lah, becos today service too mant things to take note le. got the bible vocher thing for thoses members who complete reading the bible, after that was the Holy communion, the stairs was like fully pack with people making the movement slowed by half, or should say even slower. too many people . and plus what? mother's day gift, it was not those small small kind of gift, it comes in with the boxes kind loh... was like, can i have a normal service please.... lolx was too tired to think of what i am going to do next now.... i hope i really can learn from my mistakes, really..... i dunno what i should do, throughout the sermon kept thinking what should i do to improve it, how should i go about doing such things.... but i remeber what pastor had said, in every situation, God remeber remnant, i was too bless with what i had given, before service started, was given only like 1 usher and that's it... then after that, victor and zibson come, and then karen was sitting at my zone. thanx to them leh, make everything so smooth, esp in filling up seat, karen is more experience in it, she helped me alot. i really got to thanx thanx her for a millions.... victor also, really need to thanx him alot of helping me carry the boxes all these, if it was not him, i dunno how can i survive through, this is the people i call really someone bashing through the difficult times with me.... thanx a millions.... and i was so blessed with the people sitting at west, i really dunno why, maybe is for the past few weeks keep doing west, so ya.. they kind of like know me, then got empty seats they will automatically tell me, really makes my job so much easier... i simply love them... thanx ppl. U make a difference.
Ya, that's for my ushering..as usual, today helping with attendance. today can say more experience that what i do last time, i at least not that blur doing my attendance, but as usual, cannot catch my chartered bus, so lolx, take train loh, but luckily wei quan call me ask me go home with him, so on my way back at least got someone to talk to.... we had a nice chat too... yaya... what a busy day today, was so tired, never really sleep well.... lolx, that somebody will know why...... dunno was that person reading my blog.... u should know who you are ya.... i didnt blame you ya, just hmm... sorry loh, sorry lah... haha, kinda obvious.... u know who u are lah, i dun say so much. haha....
well, in life was blessed with so many great frenz around me, i can say really blessed lah, for my frenz reading my blog. i treasure u guys, u guys make a difference in my life. i love my usher mates, -xin lian, she really encouraged me and helped me alot...... i got alot alot lah, like bro chee wei, jacquline , jasmine , alex, victor.... thanx for being such a nice bunch of poeple... haha, i am going crazy again, well, stopping here. nitex.

sadded

2005-05-04T19:50:00.000-07:00

well... what u guys wanna know? how i fare for my exams rite? ya, this morning already receive sms form NYP about my result. ard 8plus like that, the moment i see my results, haiz.... cant get back to my sleep sia... unexpectdely bad loh.... well... what can i say, only got 1 A . i hope to get least 2 like that and... duhx...
i jus dun wish to talk about it can. I am upset. dissapointed. What can i do? work harder next sem loh. is easier said then done? what to do? Over is over, done is done, finished. doned. died.
haha...... excuse me, be more positive can? lalala... ok loh. at least i maintain my GPA. Something to praise God, even i dropped, i shall praise God too.... i will praise God at all times, and His praise shall be in mouth in all times. Yeah~~
All right , that's about all.... dun really feel like saying anymore. What suppose to do, is over, think to be do, still wondering, things shouldnt be doing, i dunno. **

the day

2005-05-03T11:50:00.000-07:00

The day. ok...... well where should i say.... can i dun go through event by event today.... i am tired of what i am going through le lah.... well.... i just want to blog down what i feel loh.... i also dunno what i am feeling rite now? kinda blank as in the mind i dunno what my fingers is typing... duhx.... haha, i guess u all dun understand those chim english? is my english chim? dahz.... i falied my english pls..... and ya, where did i stop. right now, i feel really hot, sweating, singapore weather why soo hot de, miss the genting time..... haha...
i really dunno how words can express my feeling rite now, blank blank and soo blank.... i dunno ehat am i suppose to think now.... everyday was like soo carefree to me, no need anything to streess, but was like living day passes day ....... what am i doing? Someone let me free.... haha, this verse get it from f.i.r songs.... quite nice actually, it's revolution- f.i.r . yaya...... recently, jus feel like listern to songs and songs, cos really dunno what i should think about or should i say i dun wan to think about it... to think about it, i also dunno what suppose i am to think about it... whoa........ ok lah, just stop here... not in the mood to blog. so blankie.....

lalala....

2005-05-02T21:35:00.000-07:00

Alrite, i am finally back from my genting trip..... where should i start? i dun feel like mentioning from the start, becos i might almost not able to go............... jus dun feeli like saying lah, yaya....
Let me start with, ahem ahem**from the bus bah...... took soooooooooooooooo long to reach... yaya, this is my second trip there , so i dunno what really excite me.... well, the games there , erm... can say all i play before le, one thing that really leaves down a deep impression for me was the superman flying thing, dunno what's that call.... this one is my first time playing as last time i went this thing still under construction.. yaya, as this is new, so gotta pay another rm10 to play this.. but was super super super fun, really feel like you are superman flying down, i was at the corner, so was like almost feel like banging to the pole there... soo scary, i scream like hell.. and was soooo fun....
ya, and that was my first day, playing the games.... the nite time dun feel like mentioning either, my mum spoilt the entire mood. nahz.... forget about this part..
second day, went to KL. duh....... went to see the twin tower, the weather was like a drastic change, super hot. we took quite alot of photos, but then , the pictures was like so dark,**we are like shooting against the sun or something like that, was like soo duh....
and then we went to eat, - a resturant. the environment was like, "wow", when we went in, i was like: "wow, what a place!" But my impression was totally changed when the food was serve. the food was like yuckies... or should use the word" not nice"bah, i just dun like the food there..... it was too salty,( although we know salt is cheap ya, excuse me.) and ya, that was my lunch. And then, we went to sunway lagoon. wee ~ the slide was sooooo fun.... i simple lovin" it. but the bad thing was tat, we have odd numbers of people,the slide was like pair up things loh.... so my kor kor got to be, yaya.... his frenz got to run second round lah..... so poor thing, haiz..... but afterall, quite enjoyable.....
and ya, after that went to hotel, went to eat dinner and then SHOPPING! the people there was like, "people mountain people sea" haha... and the thing there was say quite chaep. ** one thing gotta teach you people, for the people reading. U benefited. in KL rite, u gotta BARGAIN, that's what my aunt teach me. the thing was soo cheap. haha... my sis brought a bag, guess what, it was suppose to be rm45. my aunt get it for rm20. isnt it "superb", or should i say real "aunty", ahem ahem** haha.. and ya, i brought a pair of shoese, quite nice..... the price should keep a secret then... lala... and ya, tiring second day, went hotel sleep sleep le then..
on my way home, we didnt went to any places lah, maybe jus went to eat. went to eat A&W. wee wee~ miss the food, espically the coke float, erm... i think is not coke. is root beer plus the ice cream thing. i love it..... cool~~ and the curly fries and the burger, nice nice~~
so ya, that's about all for my genting trip. is all quite well-planned, and quite oraganise in the sense , as in the hotel, where should we stay all these. all credits goes to my third aunt. she make it happen. haha, too bad, she wont come vist my blog.... but just feel that this trip can be improve some how.... not going through events by events, i just feel something is lack.... somehow or somewhere... well..... over is over..... and how should i fared for this trip? well, all listed. how about you be the judge? do you find that i just mentions event by events? kinda boring rite? haha...... yaya. that's about it.

today

2005-04-28T23:30:00.000-07:00

Let's start with the word today. today... *sigh... er.... nothing mucg. went to POS , was late the reason was becos i dun really feel like going there early. wasnt an excuse lah... haha, reach there also got nothing much to do... felt like wasting time, what to do..... only wacth clips and clips... but the "drumline" was very cool lah.... as in the people play so well for the drum thing, but come to think of it, gotta manage your expectation , they have professions to train up loh... so yaya..... i didnt mean we cant hit the standard, but haha.... yaya, "we are nanyang hear us roar" say hey hey to NANYANG.. whoaa.....
well, went to cgm after that.... sis jia ying preach about Holy Spirit... whoaa.... word of God +Holy Spirit = grown up. well.... a very nice preaching.... wee wee~ ya..........
Well.... gotta go genting tml liew...... think today is must last time blogging before i off for genting..... sadded? i will return on monday one lah..... haha, on monday then tell you my genting stuff..... am i excited? well... went there before once, not very excited about going there again, maybe different kind of experience as in i went there with my classmates, and now with my relatives..... so with different people but to same places, kind of boring.. but well well.... jus go loh, rather then stay at sinapore hor..... then everyday my blog will the same one, haha... nothing special going on, boring rite....... i felt the same way too.... Lolx... meaning i go genting tml, gotta miss my service... gotta miss my ushering.. gotta miss my serving to God and miss my blessing from God le... haiz......... i want to serve more after i come back..... haha! yeah..... Lolx, will stop here then... will return with more exciting things when i come back, stay tune.....

wee wee

2005-04-27T20:20:00.000-07:00

i am super tired today.... i need sleep!!! i wake up super early today like 9plus... man...... today POS was great. learn a few dance steps and cheers actions... ya, at least feel abit fruitful today. wee wee~ i hope can do contirbute more lah... cos i cant really go down on fri and monday cos i will in malaysia... haha, excited man...... but was like too tired to be excited le...haha, laughing* no sound. i am tired!!!!
lala.... haha, now feeling really tired leh, plus sleepy plus emotionless..... dun really know how to express it.... well well..... should not continue from now, cos i may influence you with my tiredness, lolx..... have you catch the diesease of tired?? how lame.... haiz....... no funny rite? dun tell me, i know lah... wahhahaa..............................................................................................

lalalaa

2005-04-26T21:45:00.000-07:00

what a day.............. now got abit of headche now. today didnt do much things, went to POS at 2pm in church, discuss cheer , banner and tees... done abit here and there, as usual nothing much was complete.. not critising lah, but yah.. at least today done the discussing part loh.. yaya... haha, went back with my POS mates, ya... talk to ryan alot of things, hear abt his prayer life, was so exciting..... wow, talk to him then realise he is another person that can look up to. a person very prayerful, got to learn fralot..... om him
today whole seems so restless..... dunno what to do, dun really feel like blogging lah, what a waste of time? what is this blog thing man.... so stupid, dun you think so?

......

2005-04-25T20:22:00.000-07:00

ok lah... today super malas to blog.... haha, nothing much today... went to POS loh, as usual, erm.... nothing much done, is more abt the stunt thing, stunt i too fat to be lifted up le, so none of my business, so also never contribute much today..... haha, oops..... after then mummy cant fetch me.. yeah~ buy genting stuff as usual... yaya, tat's abt all... went home pack bag, ya, and now blogging.... what a sian day today.... think u all dun wan me to continue rite? dun wan to bring my sianness to you guys, bored you up le... i'am sooo sooriew....
-_* have a nice day~

lalalaa...

2005-04-24T21:10:00.000-07:00

What a day today..... erm.... i dun really feel like blogging.... i got so much to blog, so much to tell, but at the moment i am so stuck..... where should i start? What am i doing? lala...... that should ask another part of me bah.... what am i talking....
well if you cant understand the first part, man.... jus forget it, i also dunno what i am doing..... alrite.... let's start everything by going to toa payoh to do my shopping for genting... well, i wanna get a slipper, but unfortunetly we brought alot of stuff, dunno whether it is neccesary,ya.... and the unfortunatly part was that i didnt brought my slipper... how funny.... lolx.....
well.... after that went amk shop shop, brought towel and stuff.... okok.. then went home le, after a tiring day...
Back home...... slack and slack... ya, pack abit of thing le, abit kiasu u can say.... this friday then go off... haha...... well, jus plan plan first loh, talk to me -if u fail to plan, u plan to fail... yaya.... wee wee~ excited in the sense i should be.... but.. haha.... what am i haha-ing about man..... let's keep a secret, dun wanna tell you people.... wahahaha....
tml POS at 1pm in school... in the sense dun feel like going? what am i suppose to do man........ dun feel like blogging anymore. people come and go** how funny people can be huh? human being? - cant figure out.

Wee Wee~

2005-04-24T01:10:00.000-07:00

Whaha.. now is going to 1am le... and i am still so excited... know what? wee wee~ today i help to collect hall attandance for ushering.... so happiew.... hall attendance is to gather the attandance of every zone and then compile together and see the whole attendance of service 3, i am explaining for the sake of thoses ppll not in ushering , soooo excuse me ya... wahaha.... honoured rite...... although got some mistake here and there... but, praise God lol.... sis wen hui not really very angry, next time gonna do much much better, at least i already know how to collect attendance, break through..... wee wee~ i feel soo happiew when God can use me in different manner of what i didnt expected.... Lolx... happiew..... whooa... today service 3 think ard 1746 ppl attended, think lah, not really remember the figure... wahaha.... okiex, tat's abt my ushering. today i usher at west, praise God.. my zone is filled! i think i like to do west alot, cos the people there so cooperative de leh, i ask them to give up, they will try to give up some seats and then really count the number members coming and the seat they need and really filled it up.... and some will like tell me there is how many how many empty seats one, automatically... i was, impressed. unlike thses congregation whereby jus book seats, like i want the whole row dun even know there are how many seats per row, jus book blindly... not meant to complain lah.... but you know..... be more specific mah.... rite brother and sister? we are still one family in Christ ya... dun worry. Amen.....
ok, that's about ushering...... todaysermon was even great... seed times and harvest shall not cease... like what the bible says, if the earther remain day and nigh, and cold and heat shall not cease... i was like thinking , quite true leh... no matter rain or shine, there will still be day and night... sun and windy'; heat and cold.... really impressed, it is like even the devil cant control it... so devil definetly cant control seed times and harvest, it proves one thing, when u begin to sow. it will surely harvest. one thing speacial abt it was, nite ,day ,rain ,shine ,we cant get a chance to choose... but God gave us , man, the power of authority to maintain order in this world. He give us power to choose what type of seed we want to sow.... issnt it great? if you wan apples? talk to me. - you got to sow apples seeds? issnt simple..... sow what u want to reap..... sow bountifully and you willreap bountifully... haha..... i preach too much le..... love today sia... super happening...
alrite for now... is getting later..... whole day was like so hungry... haiz... now still ok le lah, got eat something.. wee wee~ loving ya today....

This is the day

2005-04-22T20:00:00.000-07:00

Wee~ What a day today...... the most remarkable day for today was the prayer meeting. It just an encounter with God, where i can really feel the deepest presence of God for some times.... it been sometimes really getting into His presence and cry before Him, love His comfort.... love His presence..... i am refresh and recharge. my mind block was suddenly gone, Ecc11:10 i think, that verse really impact me so much. (it's say something abt take away the sorrow that is in your heart, the evil of your flesh. and youth should be more then that, it's abt rejocing and the strength of the youth is powerful) are you a youth? below the age of 25? you are a youth? What is your time spending most of the time? dun waste your time and strength, be someone useful today... haha, preach too much le, oops..... thanx guys, it's ur passion brought the presence in.. wee wee~
alrite, before that was actually went to POS, dunno some how the ppl change alot, quite few ppl turn up... alrite, we somehow got the dance steps, but then....erm... but was too difficult le lah.... i cant really manage to get groove, clumsy me... haha..... hopefully able to contribute much....
ok, got to rest for now.... soo hungry wor..... but really full this afternoon after my lunch, we ate long john at jp. with benjamin before went to POS, well.... we are lae for the POS, so sad.... regretted. haha......
hao bah... tat's for now.... i am soo free after my exam, having holidays. so can go blog every now and then le, boring things also write down to bored you guys.. i am soooo sorry..... haha, purposely.... *oopps...

hmmm.......

2005-04-21T20:30:00.000-07:00

Today never do much things.. slacks slack at home, sleep until 12 plus... wahaha... yesterday sleep very late wor, ard 3 plus like that, haha.... that somebody loh, very negative, so must encourage encourage, lolx.... so end up wake up late... i not piggy one, if sleep early will wake up early de mah... haha. so ya, wake up le, go out with my mum and sister go update photo for my passport, excited to go genting next week le.. wee wee~ haha.... although went there quite recently, but now i went again can fellowship with my relatives.... lolx.... dunno what to bring wor, wee wee~ excited excited...
so.... ya, not much to say actaully, so sad wor, never go live recording today... sooo much wanted to go wor..... haiz....... scared my mummy scold loh, so.... =( so now, so bored, watching tv... yeah!!
hao bah........ stop here, dun wan mention anything le, that's all..... i just felt i wanted to say something, but haiz... better dun say, lolx... my blog too restricted le, wanted to say. but duh.... dun wan better, haha... tat's my blog what, i can what i like... yuppiex.

sing and singing

2005-04-21T01:45:00.000-07:00

Well ... just come back from live recording, almost no voice le..... not screaming lah, but really sing too much le, yesterday never blog, actually too tired le cos went to rehersal yesterday. And today was the actual recording... was so cool... the presence of God esp the last part, my favourite, the strike force thing... wee wee~ claps claps for the drummers.... but was abit tired... lol, but never regret althought kena scolding from my mum for the 2 days.... haiz..... she sooo fierce, guss tml i cant be going le...... be praying for you guys , better sing properly, i know you guys can do it even without me de ... Lolx.
Alrite, tat's for the live recording... actually these fews days was busy and busy, no time to think abt anything le..... got time also dun wan to think abt anything... the anything jus dun wan to mention abt the thing..... sound confusing? dun understand? ya, tat's what my heart felt exactly... haiz....
What can i say, sleep and dun think for now... soon it will get over de....... everything will be fine. Anyway, anybody reading my blog de? i dun really advertise much, too desserted le. haha, nitex everyone.

Another day...

2005-04-19T00:57:00.000-07:00

Luckily not much ppl know abt my blog, i dun wish to advertise..... well, what could i say abt today..... nothing much actually, met up with sis mayce today at nyp mac, tok abt visions and stuff, prayed, read bible....
hmmm... still another day, i hope i wont think too much.... yay, i dun wish to think too much neither, anyway, nobody will come visit my blog, dun blog too much le.. wasting my time.
yaya................

Today?

2005-04-18T00:25:00.000-07:00

ok, what should i start with. today start with a bad mood actually, becos of that particular person, dun feel like mentioning the name, you know who you are, but dunno if the person will read my blog. alrite, yesterday sort of like giving me attitude, today that person dunno weird weird, dun wan reply my sms. fine with me, but all the best to you in your exam ya! (*quite obvious wor...)
Alrite, let's forget abt this person, wake up today at 9plus, quickly go bath then go church. see bro keeliang and his sister in chartered bus, didnt really tok much, was reading the bible though. after service, rush down to meet my sis go my aunt house... well ,my hp was low batt. unlucky day.............................................. i hate it man, when ppl cant sms. fine fine. over means over. ok, wasted trip, go down my cousin wanted to go out already, ok loh. go there also dunno do what like that................ haiz.... went play pool with my sis, fun as in the game.. ya.....
dunno what to say now, hopefully hopefully..... hopefully....... i am waiting......

2005-04-15T01:17:00.000-07:00

Yo everyone... i am back, i know i know..... i have been years went missing le.... been really busy until now, only one month plus never updates blog mah... what's the big deal rite... well well, where should i start.... Happy happy. becos exams over! yuppies, celebrate good times com'on... okies, so good excuse why i never blog, becos of my exam loh, want to score well well for exams mah.... okok..... out of my 4 core module, hmmm.... i guess u guys know what i wanna say, the more i not very confodent was my c prog loh, expected rite... the paper was like ok for the first part, but fainted when i saw the second part, hopefully hopefully able to pass ya..... can can de lah, i have God with me, yeah!! Alrite, what is over is over..... future is in God's hand... i am now rotting at home le, wish to get a job for my holis, at least earn some buckies... yeah, buy my things... lolx..... lalala.... happy... happy* oh ya, tell you guys a secret, i am a getting my MM promotion this sat in svc 2... lala.... excted. MM= ministry member ya... remember that interview, i was like so nervous wor.... haha, excited excited.... alrite, now for the time being, in excited mode... lala... God bless ya...

Yeah, i am back

2005-03-11T01:31:00.000-08:00

alrite.. after my long long old days never blog.. here is another entries... after my common test for like one weeks, got back my result, starting with the worst one, my c programing... guess guess? i got D lah, well thought i will fail, but manage to do it, Yeah! then got B for my electroncis communication, and got an A for my Electronics analysic circuit, hmm.. so happy, although got 1 A nia.. i wanna strive hard for my exams! havent got back my math, i hope i can score well... ya.. still need to rush alot of proj! recently very moody, becos of that elective - entreprenaurship... really so fed up with my group mems.. jus dun wan talk abt it, thinking of it make me mad and i jus dun wan to destroy my blog by make it ugly... bweui... i wanna get this over! and i mean it!!! i hate it man....i am hating it.. shits and shits sia... alrite alrite, enough of it... ok, yesterday went to singapore indoor stadium to do my support duty... well, was quite a memorising experience... i leave SIS at 1130, actually wanted to take cab to kallang station but then.. nv saw a cab.. to make the story short, i end up waiting for wei quan wanting to take cab home with him.. well... while waiting, dunno is God's arrangement to let me see two guys..- alvin and fabian , my usher mates as well.. they say still got bus then we run and run to catch the bus, they make me climb over the fence, is like! WOW! never do it before, the fence was not very small one, is a quite high one you know.. becos of the thing kane block after dunno what time... then wait and wait , the bus nv came.. end up took cab home!! haha,,, understand? if cant get it... is hmm.. haha..... well.. been really tired these few days.. so tired, , dun feel like talking... i dunno what happen to me, mind was blank, i know what what i need to do, yet i didnt do... confused me!! dun ask me what happen, jus dun feel like saying and i just dunno... i jus feel that sometimes i am so far away from God.. i wanna get back , get back into his presence again.... yeah! i wanna do something... pray for me please.... God bless eeyone who is reading this...

Tired tired day yah....

2005-02-23T01:17:00.000-08:00

well, today...ahem** dun say le, didnt feel i did well in my common test, wasnt have much confidence in passing, but i know by God's grace, i am able to do it!! yeah, believing and praying.. well, let's drop the topis to my common test, the intersting part for the day was the conference.. after my common test,(did i say i dun wan to mention it anymore...,oops), lol.. ok, it ended at 6pm , i came out early ard 5plus, then reach church ard 6plus, i need to usher, so i quickly go toilet to change my formal clothes, i change very fast, luckily.. haha; fun experience though.. my formal shirt was crumbled... becos i put inside my bag loh.. haiz.. well, go inside the auditorium, dunno look for who to report, jus anyhow ask a person, (usher lah) then he dunno ask me find who, end up doing S4... and was almost filled at that moment, like i cannot help out alot like tat, but got help out in giving out the offering bucket. then the sermon was great, abt friendship, though was very tired for the whole day, the sermon i never felt asleep, haha.. i think one of the reason becos i sitting at stairs, wah sei, backside so pain sia...lol... then at chartered bus saw joan, long time no see her le... we fellowship alot.. yaya// happy happy fellowship, loving one another... thanx for being my frenz, all thouse who is reading these.. thanx thanx :) loving ya

Comon test week!!!

2005-02-21T16:21:00.000-08:00

Just wake up from my afternoon nap... so tired today, wasted all my energy on the "electornics communication"paper, from 11am to 123opm... tat paper say easy ,quite not, in fact quite tricky... quite different from the past year common test, i dunno how do i fare, hope it's good. *praying** well.. tml still got a paper, "c prog" my "favoutite" module of all, dun really understand computer language, i still havent touch abit, prayer harder for me tml.. lol :0 haha... well, been a super tired day, no more engergy liao, later gotta study and study only... c programing, here i gotta defeat you!!! haha... lame hor.. today readed journal, (got the word readed??) lol... well say abt growing up, putting away childish acts, jus now, i very childish? hmm.... oops... i born cute lah... haha, if you are seeing this, pls dun hit me when you see me. oops, childish acts again... lol.... what am i doing, *sianx... time to take a rest, think haha.... inside cannot make it already...
**tired.... Yeah, my house got 2 dog le, so cuttee... but still love my doggie, when i come out, so nosiy, 2 dog seeing me.. lol... when come eating more worst, 2 dog watching you, how am i going to eat. lol.... kkae, go study. together emerge...
this is the song , lalala... haha :0

What a day!!!

2005-02-20T00:11:00.000-08:00

Yeah, i am back.. well... today is sunday, and i got to stay at home, not too bad lah, 1 plus like tat came back from my aunt hse, yesterday went svc 2 then go my aunt hse cut hair then stay over nite at her place...well, my hair, hmm... dun say first, give u all a surprise bah... ;x lol, okok, the reason i stay home is to study for my common test tml.. i didnt really study much, i so tired and so sian.. but i know i gonna use Hies strength to study and glorify Him!! yeah! i can do all thing in Christ who strengthen me... okok.... nothing much today, only study and study.... yeah, all the way, study!!!!!!! tml common test at 11am, people people , please pray for kies.... =) lalalala.... study is my best frenz.... God create test just for me... lalala......

itchy hand....

2005-02-18T12:37:00.000-08:00

hmm... later i am going to see a doctor, dunno what happen to my hands, becoming itchy, like mosqito bite, bite until the whole hand like swollen, very ugly, yesterday after the movie more worst, but i didnt tell my frenz cos my hand was super ugly, dun dare to show them... but now ok le, i thought no need to see doctor, but my mummy insisted to go see loh, haiz.. waste money... now waiting to 2pm then can go, doctor break from 12 to 2pm... i am gonna study, but recently feel so tired, dunno what happen also... haha, yeah!! later cgm.. haha, dunno what gonna happen, but must haven a heart of expectancy... Well.. was thinking, i write so much dunno got ppl come and see anot... my blog dun have a tag board, sorry ppl, will make one if i am free, i dunno how to make a tag, so need my sister to help me with it, so jus bear with it ok.. so where was i.... haix.. so lazy to type leh... but tml is saturday!! yeah, service, and going aunt hse to cut hair, wanting to cut my hair for so long ago, even b4 chinese new year, but always dun have the time... so tml will be the day!!!! happiew** wishing upon the star// lalala... jus read the journal,- abt qualification of the leader, wow.. being a leader wasnt easy, need to hav vision and revelation daily, proven good character and reputation, good discernment, abilty to serve God well, love the word of God, bla bla... the journal really helps me alot, walking with God, never regret buying it. alrite, for the time being, need study................................ i am loving it, confession is creation, i love to study, God create books to be my frenzs!! lala.... getting "A"s is what God create jus for me. lala.... stars*stars*

What a long day...

2005-02-17T21:33:00.000-08:00

today is thur, my nite class day, all the way from 11am to 930pm, haha.. but lucky me, lecturer let us off at 830pm, and guess what, the lesson from 3pm to 6pm is canceled, and we must well skip the lesson at 1pm, so me and my classmates went to eat pizza at woodlands then after tat went to catch a movie, -Hide and seek.Well, can say is a not bad movie, is abt a ger having an imaginary frenz,-charlie. ya, then this charlie is like killing everyone loh, cannot say too much, watch it for yourself.. haha, alrite lah, me going to study later for my common test, is coming real soon, coming monday. sisters and brothers, please pray for me!!!

yeah.. i am back..

2005-02-16T15:37:00.000-08:00

well, today is the second day of my blog, i dunno what to write.. hhmmxx... ok, today lesson end at 3pm, yah, jus reach home. going to bible study later... nothing much today, common test coming, please pray for me... been so tired these fews day, i know my blog wasnt very nice, becos was lazy to find blogskin and put in the song all these.... and lazy to fill in my pofile and all, if you are first time visiting, i apologise.. wahaha... i will try to complete if am free, tat's mean after my common test lah, cos really so stress, oops, i confessed. actually, coping well with my studies and all, jus worry abt my c programing... hope can score well and glorify God in my studies. Sisters and brothers, let's wait for my testimonial bah... wahaha, excited. excited for this weekend, going my aunt hse to cut hair, dunno cut what style, but so sad, like cannot usher, becos of the busing coupon things, make the things need more usher, well, i not complaining, jus an opportunity for us to serve more, yeah~ so happy recently, able to help my team IC to collect greeter attendance, let's rejoice serving in the Lord, yeah!!! -serving God differently in 2005. EmErGiNg....